yesterday some kidslaughed at me
and it made me feel bad i don't know why i mean generally i don't care but for some reason i felt bad
it just got to me i mean what right do those kids have to laugh at me i mean i coulda turned around and been so rude, trust me it wouldn't of been hard to put these kids in their place
yet i didn't
i'm a smart ass when it comes down to it and i can make most ppl i know cry if i really want to, yet i don't
i'm better than that and i don't
i don't put ppl down
i don't laugh at ppl
i don't make fun of ppl
i respect them for who they are and what they want to do and let it be what it is
kids make fun of one another without realize how extensive the damage they are doing runs
most of the ppl who commit suicide are teens
it's the third leading cause of death among ppl our age
that's so sad
and when it comes down to it
the majority of kids do it because they can't stand the environment they are in which is mostly school
they can't take the constant criticism and being put down they think the only way out is to die
that's so incredibly sad
it's always put in our faces
yet kids don't have the common sense to leave one another alone
they just keep at it
how many ppl will kill themselves because of other kids before it's put through our heads not to make fun of one another
i hate it so much
it's so unfair
why can't ppl just leave ppl alone
ppl are just so mean to each other
and i don't get it
i never will
and i hope i'm never like that to anyone
sorry for the random spewing
but those kids got to me yesterday in a way that no body has gotten to me in quite some time
i just wanted to cry and there wasn't any real reason
i mean why shoudl i care about two kids i don't know that didn't look any better than me i normally don't care
taht's what i don't get
why those kids got to me
i just don't understand
you can't help that
you can't help it when something gets to you
it just happens
i hate ppl so much sometimes they are so horrible, why must we hurt one another the way we do it's insane. it's an endless cycle of hurt and pain and all i can hope for is that it will stop one day, one day i hope ppl will have the common sense to just leave one another alone, be as encouraging as possible, and just ignore the ignorant comments, i've been to that place where i thought the only way out was to die, i've been there a few times and it's not fun not in the least, i've done a lot of growing up and have a lot of my own philosophies on different things, and i no longer feel it's the only way out though things at times really get to me i finally have friends worthy of talking about it with. that is the best thing in the world, i feel so lucky to have the friends i do.
9:37 p.m. - 2002-08-30
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